Memory Bank

My name is Mimi Scoretz and I am the daughter of Marion Schmidt, who is presently at Copper Ridge Place in Whitehorse, Yukon. We believe looking at Mother’s journals now that ten years ago, when she was 76, she was actually suffering from the initial stages of dementia. She knew it, and it was very distressing to her.  She told us she was losing her memory, but because she had been so bright, so capable, so indomitable, her entire life, we children all ‘pooh-poohed’ her and said, “Oh, Mother, it can’t possibly be. You’re just tired”. But, she knew. One clue was that she loved to go square-dancing and she started to get mixed up with the calls. The club eventually ushered her out. Still, we didn’t take her seriously. We thought she just stopped square dancing; in fact these were the early signs of dementia.

Almost everything I value came from my mother. She was always searching; she never stopped looking for a better way.  Mother taught me the importance of the spiritual life. I remember her telling me once, “Mimi, do you know how important it is when you see someone suffering, to say, ‘God Bless You’? Maybe no one will ever do that for the person. Everyone deserves a blessing.” I never have forgotten that.

When we took my mother to Copper Ridge Place, it was so difficult. We never dreamed we would ever do such a thing. It was one of the hardest things we siblings ever did.  But what really touched me was when we first took my mother there, one of the women residents was dying. She had been brought in to join the other residents because the staff felt it was important to allow her to feel that she was still part of things. But no one was speaking to her. We were taking mother back to her room, and as we went by this woman my mother reached out and touched the woman’s hair and said, “God bless you.” Even in dementia, my mother is so unfailingly gracious with others. That beautiful quality that she’s had since she was a child, that sense of being precious that is my mother, continues on. 

When my mother was 20, she was living in Seattle; three months after meeting my father in 1941 she had married him and found herself living in Fairbanks, Alaska. Father was a gold miner who worked on "the creeks" in Alaska and Canada's Yukon. All their married life she moved between California in the winter and the North in the summer with us five children.

Our parents had a wonderful marriage. She suffered greatly when my Dad died when she was 48, and years later when my brother Craig died at 23. Initially, when Dad died, Mother wanted to die too. But through courage and effort she pulled herself together, determined to carry on. Eventually she became an excellent business worman and achieved success with her mining company in the Yukon.

My son Michael is a 29-year-old soldier in the Canadian military and he’s been, from the time he was born, a very thoughtful person. Michael has two grandmothers with dementia. In February 2006 he was planning his wedding. He was leaving for Afghanistan, and he phoned me up two days before and he said, “Mother, Jackie and I have everything we need. We’d like you organize something with the Alzheimer Society so that wedding guests could make donations instead of buying presents.” The Alzheimer Society received over three thousand dollars.  It was such a beautiful gesture, and I know that my son’s generous spirit in part comes from my mother and that she will carry on through her children and grandchildren.

 Mother has shown great inner strength and resources throughout her life. She has been determined for herself, her children and grandchildren to bring her life, which had been painful at times, to a better place.  In spite of the difficulties she’s encountered, she continues to express gratitude for life, for people, and for the beauty of the world around her.

 As of May 2009, Michael’s two grandmothers have both passed away.

Marion Schmidt died on October 8, 2008 at the age of 87.

Sara Scoretz died on April 8, 2009 at the age of 99.

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